When you get old...

Today, I watched In Sickness and Health.

I've always feared getting Alzheimer's Disease or any kind of condition or disease which might affect my ability to function mentally, but after watching this, I have come to see it in a new light. So long as I have faith, it will be alright. I will be able to get through. In a way, it's like going back to being a child and I'm not afraid of that so long as I have people I love there to support me and if not then God.

This reminds me of my Mum. She does not have Alzheimer's, but she has been gradually losing her memory since she had a stroke and had to get a blood clot taken out of her brain. I should be grateful that she is still here, but I get frustrated sometimes, when she seems to be the child and not me. It's a very selfish way of thinking. I need to be more understanding of her condition, that she can't help it. It makes me sad to think of how many times I have made her cry out in frustration at her own state because of my impatience.

I am now making it a goal to have more patience and to be willing to cater to whatever needs she may have as she continues to grow older. After all, she has looked after me all my life.

♥ Amy

Exactly What I Need...

As now seems to be my early Sunday morning routine, I watched a Mormon Message video clip on YouTube. Today's was: Good Things To Come.

It was exactly what I needed to hear. Or rather, the gospel is exactly what I need.

Every so often, I feel down. And every time I do, I try to escape those feelings. On the internet you have access to just about anything so this is usually the tool I use. I try music, movies, manga, facebook, and whatever else I can think of. As a result, what was intended to be a late night usually turns into an early morning and a whole lot of zzzs to catch up on. More, more, more and it just never seems to be quite enough. It is when I turn myself to God that I get exactly what I need.

At the same time, I acknowledge that a person cannot always be happy. Life can't always be smiles and sunshine. To live you must experience both the bad and the good. I think I talked about this in my last blog entry, but I want to add to that. It's like what Elder Holland talked about in the video clip. We need to trust God that He knows what he's doing and that things will get better.

God knows exactly what we need.

♥ Amy

Hot Days, Cold Nights & the Blessings of God

I just finished watching: God's Words...Never Cease and Come What May & Love It.

The background music to the first Mormon Message, "Strength Beyond My Own" by Steven Kapp Perry, like many other things which I have encountered this week, made me feel very nostalgic and a little homesick.

Along with that this week hasn't been my best. I've had to work 40hrs on a job that I do not like in the heat of the Hawaii sun. I've had issues that I've needed to sort out with one of my coworkers. My nerves have been working up over a Maori competition that I've been practicing for.

Altogether it's been exhausting.

However, I have also seen the Lord's hand working in my life.

I managed to remember and complete everything I needed to do this week. I had an awesome day off with my friends. I got my hair cut for free.

And, from the trials I've had, I have:

1. Lost weight (apparently)
2. Learned to forgive, even when no recompense is made on the other side
3. Received comfort from a friend as well as service - help with my short poi skills for the Maori competition

My homesickness has allowed me to grow closer to a beloved friend whom God sent to me as a comfort and a listening ear. I feel that our bond has been strengthened and the trust between us deepened.

Along with all this I have been given the push I need to make some decisions which have been pressing on my mind for some time.

The Lord's love has been coming in at me from all sides.

I know that life can't always go how you want it to go. You can't always be happy. There is a time for all things and as Elder Wirthlin said in the second Mormon Message, these experiences are "part of [the] on-the-job-training" we so greatly need while on this earth.

We need to remember in these times that God loves us and put our trust in Him.

Rather than complaining, we need to be grateful for what we are given and have hope that there are better things to come.

I'm just going to finish with a short song I made up as I was walking home tonight:

I see the stars above in the sky
So I thank thee Lord for giving me eyes
I feel the breeze brush against my skin
So I thank thee Lord for the skin that I'm in
It's such a blessing to be alive
True, I've had my complaints
But really, Dear Lord, I love my life

♥ Amy

VIRTUE - because you're worth it

Just finished watching: Virtue: For Such a Time as This (Esther 4:14)

Today, virtue is not valued as it ought to be. Today, you see women on music videos wearing next to nothing and, on the other end of the scale, you hear about women focusing on their careers rather than getting married and having children.

Today, people are so outwardly focused. And it's really no wonder with the media coming in at us from every angle. Newspapers, radio, magazines, TV, the internet, peer pressure - it can be difficult to see what we really need to be focusing on: Christ.

It's like what a friend told me: "If he doesn't love you regardless of what you look like, then he doesn't really love you."

Now, I'm not saying that it's bad to take care of your outward appearance. It's certainly no crime to be beautiful.

I'm just trying to point out that in today's society, a lot of women just don't seem to value what it means to be a woman anymore.

From the way I see things, true beauty is not in the way your face looks, naturally or otherwise. It's not in being lean and toned. It's not in the clothes and accessories you wear.

A woman's true beauty can be seen in MOTHERHOOD.

So be virtuous ladies because you're worth it.

♥ Amy